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12月6日

钱锺书先生翻译举隅

    摘自《谈艺录》
  
  钱锺书先生当代硕学,其博学多闻,覃思妙虑,并世罕俦。世人咸知先生通多国文字,顾先生少有译作,唯于著述中援引外国作家之语类多附注原文,学者于此得所取则。唯零金碎玉检索不易,爰特搜集成册,以便观览。后生末学得窥云中之一鳞,证月印于千江,则此帙之辑为不虚矣。
  
   ——李慎之
   一九八九年六月
  
  1.If all the sky were parchment and all the sea were ink
   按“青天做纸张”之语,西方各国诗人皆有之,常以“碧海化墨水”为对。P.19
  
  2.New forms are simply canonization of inferior genres.
  百凡新体,只是向来卑不足道之体忽然列品入流。P.35
  
  3.behind its attributes
  须在未具性德以前,推其本质。P.37
  
  4.“Not of the letter, but of the spirit; for the letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life.”
  意在言外,得意忘言,不以词害意。P.43
  
  5.To hold, as’t were, the mirror up to nature.
  持镜照自然。P.60
  
  6.selective imitation
  取舍之工。P.60
  
  7.This is an art / Which does mend nature, change it rather, but/ That art itself is Nature (The Winter’s Tale, IV, iv. Polixenes)
  莎士比亚尝曰:“人艺足补天工,然而人艺即天工也。”p.61
  
  8.In shape the perfection of the berry, in light the radiance of the dewdrop. (Lord Tennyson; A Memoir, by his son, Vol. I, P.211)
  体完如樱桃,光灿若露珠。P.114
  
  9.“A poem round and perfect as a star. ”(Alexander Smith: A Life Drama)
  “诗好比星圆。”P.114
  
  10.“It used to be said of a famous cricketeer that he bowled or batted with his head. ”(S. Alexander: Beauty and Other Forms of Value, p.25)
  画以心而不以手。P.211
  
  11.A direct sensuous apprehension of thought.
  能以官感领会义理。P.232
  
  12.Be thou thine own home, and in thy selfe dwell;/Inn any where, continuance maketh hell./ And seeing the snaile, which every where doth rome, /Carrying his owne house still, still is at home.(Complete Poetry and Selected Prose, ed. J. Hayward, pp.153-4)
  万物皆备于身,方之蜗牛戴壳,随遇自足,著处为家。—— 约翰唐(John Donne)名篇: (To Sir Henry Wotton)P.232
  
  13.“Poetry should strike the Reader as a working of his own highest thoughts and appear almost a Remembrance. ”(Letter to Taytor, 27 Feb. 1818, H. E. Rollins, ed., Letters I, 238)
  “好诗当道人心中事,一若忆旧而得者。” ——济慈 (Keats) 论诗第一要义(axiom)P.255
  
  14.ear pleasure
   悦耳 P.269
  
  15.mind pleasure
   餍心 P.269
  
  16.unreasonable or magical element
   不落理路、神幻无方。P.269
  
  17.natural magic
   魔力 P.269
  
  18.inspiration
   落笔神来之际 P.269
  
  19.catharsis
   情欲宣泄 P.270
  
  20.purification
   斋心洁己 P.270
  
  21.All Arts aspire to the condition of music.
   佩特谓诸艺造妙皆向往于音乐之空灵澹荡。 P.271
  
  22. Most imitative of arts(S. H. Butcher: Aristotle’s Theory of Poetry and Fine Art, P.122)
  “乐在诸艺中最近自然。”P.271
  
  23.committed fornication
   意淫 P.273
  
  24.mental fictions
   乱真 P.273
  
  25.“All emotion, Of thorough enough, would take one to heaven.”
   “一切情感,充极至尽,皆可引人入天。” P.288
  
  26.“This creative reason thinks eternally. Of this unceasing work of thought, however, we retain no memory, because this reason is unaffected by its objects. ”(Aristotle’s Psychology, with Introduction and Notes, by E. Wallace, ” P.161, P.272)
   “无时间性,变易不居,勿滞于物,不可记忆。” P.289
  
  27.“None can care for literature in itself who do not take a special pleasure in the sound of names. ”
   “凡不知人名地名声音之谐美者,不足以言文。”——史梯芬生《游美杂记》(Stevenson: Across the Plains Tuesday) P.295
  
  28.“Silence and speech acting together”
   “语言与静默协力”——卡莱尔论象征 P.309
  
  29.“Leave something to the willing intelligence of the reader. ”
   须留与读者思量。——佩特论文 P.309
  
  30.thinking intently of his own name
   英诗人丁尼生常言自思其名字,系念不散。P.312
  
  31.“and the earth looked black behind them, /as though turned up by plows. But it was gold,/All gold—a wonder of the artist’s craft. ”—Iliad, XVIII 630-32
  “犁田发土,泥色俨如黑。然此盾固纯金铸也,盖艺妙入神矣。”P.318
  
  32.“O! One glimpse of the human face, and shake of the human hand, is better than whole reams of this cold, thin correspondence, etc. ”—Works, ed. E. V. Lucas, VI, 175
   “得与其人一瞥面、一握手,胜于此等枯寒笔墨百函千牍也。噫!” P.320
  
  33.habitualization, automatization
   落套刻板 P.320
  
  34.defamiliarization
   使熟者生 P.320
  
  35.rebarbarization
   使文者野 P.320
  
  36.“Grace of style comes from arrangement. ”
   “词意位置得当,文章遂饶姿致。”P.325
  
  37.repose, perfect fitness
   一字之稳当 P.328
  
  38.“I have such a sensitive ear that the repetition of a word irritates me three pages away. ”—A. Rhodes, The Poet as Superman, 46
   “至谓一字在三页后重出,便刺渠耳。”—— 邓南遮P.329
  
  39.“We have had the brow and the eye of the moon before; but what have we reserved for human beings, if their features and organs are to be lavished on objects without feeling and intelligence? ”—Letters: Later Years, ed. E. de Selincourt, I, 436
   “语已有月眉、月眼矣。复欲以五官百体尽予此等无知无情之物,吾人独不为己身地耶。”—— 华兹华斯 P.344
  
  40.“The first is physical. The second is intellectual and is much higher. The third signifies a nobler power of the soul which is so high and so noble that it apprehends God in His own naked being. ”—Sermon XIX, in James M. Clark, Meister Eckhart, 220, cf. 62
  “学为有上中下三等:下学以身;中学以心知;上学以神,绝伦造极,对越上帝。” ——十四世纪德国神秘宗师爱克哈特(Meister Eckhart)P.366
  
  41.Meister Eckhart, Sermon, XII:“I take a basin full of water, place in it a mirror and put it below the sun’s disc. The reflection of the sun is the sun within the sun, and yet the mirror remains what it is.”
   “以一镜照形,以余镜照影,镜镜相照,影影相传;是形也、与影无殊,是影也、与形无异。”P.371
  
  42.“If Galileo had said in verse that the world moved, the Inquisition might have left him alone. —quoted in R. Gittings, The Older Hardy, Penguin, 1980, 120
  “苟伽俐略只作诗述其地球转动说,则宗教法庭或且任纵之而不问。”——哈代 P.388
  
  43.To count chicken before they are hatched.
   “卵未抱而早计雏数。”P.392
  
  44. Edward Young, Conjectures on Original Composition: “A genius differs from a good understanding, as a magician from an architect; that raises his structure by means invisible, this by the skilful use of common tools.”—E. D. Jones, ed., English Critical Essays;16th, 17th and 18th Centuries, “The World’s Classics”, 279
   “天才与聪慧之别,犹神通之幻师迥异乎构建之巧匠;一则不见施为,而楼台忽现,一则善用板筑常器,经之营之。”——爱德华·杨 P.411
  
  45.E. H. Gombrich, Art and Illusion, 5th ed., 1977, 174-5,“screen”, “the power of expressing through absence of brush and ink.”
  无笔墨处与点染处互相发挥烘托。P.415
  
  46. “The most beautiful figure is the sphere among solids and the circle among plane figures.”—Diogenes Laertes, VIII. 35, “Loeb”, II, 351
  立体中最美者为球,平面中最美者为圈。——毕达哥拉斯 P.430
  
  47. “Let it (the mind) once become a sphere, and spherical it abides.”—Marcus Aurelius, Meditations VIII§41, tr. J. Jackson, 152
   心不为外物所著,当如圆球。——古罗马哲人马可·奥勒留 P.430
  
  48.“On a Drop of Dew”
   So the Soul, that Drop, that Ray,
   Of the clear Fountain of Eternal Day,
   …
   Does, in its pure and circling thoughts express
   The greater Heaven in an Heaven less
   —Helen Gardner, ed., The Metaphysical Poets, Penguin, 1972, 241
   露珠圆澄,能映白日,正如灵魂之圆转环行,显示天运也。——英国诗人马委尔(Andrew Marvell)《露珠》诗 P.431
  
  49.“Till rolling time is lost in round eternity.”—Dryden, The Hind and Panther, Pt III, 1.19
  圆永恒 P.431
  
  50.Why, at the height of desire and human pleasure—worldly, social, amorous, ambitious, or even avaricious—does there mingle a certain sense of doubt and sorrow?—L. A. Marchand, Byron, 1957, II, 900
   入世务俗,交游酬应,男女爱悦,图营势位,乃至贪婪财货,人生百为,于兴最高、人最欢时,辄微觉乐趣中杂以疑虑与忧伤,其故何耶。P.438
  
  51. I have thought some of nature’s journeymen had made men, and not made them well, they imitated humanity so abominably.— Hamlet, III. Ii
   “其人似为大自然之学徒所造,手艺甚拙,像人之形而狞恶可憎。”——哈姆雷特 P.464
  
  52.One may remember the lion of medieval bestiaries who, at every step forward, wiped out his footprints with his tail, in order to elude his pursuers.—L. Spitzer:“Linguistics and Literary History”, in D. C. Freeman, ed., Linguistics and Literary Style, 1970, 31
  有如中世纪相传,狮子每行一步,辄掉尾扫去沙土中足印,俾追者无可踪迹。P.466
  
  53. Why does a painting seem better in a mirror than outside it? —Leonardo da Vinci, Notebooks, tr. E. Maecurdy, II, 272
   “镜中所映画图,似较镜外所见为佳,何以故?”P.483
  
  54.Of making many books there is no end; and much study is a weariness of flesh. —Ecclesiastes, xii. 12
  “书籍无穷,多读徒疲精弊体。”——旧约全书P. 502
  
  55. Wit, you know is the unexpected copulation of ideas, the discovery of some occult relation between images in appearance remote from each other.—Rambler, No. 194, Everyman’s Lib., 284;cf. R. Wellek, A History of Modern Criticism, I, 3
   “使观念之配偶出人意表,于貌若漠不相关之物象察见其灵犀暗通。”——约翰生 P.522
  
  56. Foregrounding, the intentional violation of the norm of the standard, distortion
  刻意破常示异。 P.532
  
  57. Normally every datum of sense is at once devoured by a hungry intellect and digested for the sake of its vital juices. Knowledge is not eating. —G. Santayana, The Life of Reason, I, 75, 77
   当世论师以唯心论与为实论均常拟致知于饮食,遂嘲为“口腹哲学。” P.535
  
  58.Everything is the same, but you are not here, and I still am. In separation the one who goes away suffers less than the one who stays behind. —Leslie A. Marchand, Byron, II 783
   “此间百凡如故,我仍留而君已去耳。行行生别离,去者不如留者神伤之甚也。”P.541
  
  59.Poetry, like schoolboys, by too frequent and severe corrections, may be cowed into Dullness.—The Notebooks of S. T. Coleridge, ed. K. Coburn, I 35
   诗苟多改痛改,犹学童常遭塾师扑责,积威之下,易成钝儿。——柯尔律治 P.557
  
  60.that particular kind of borrowing which thinks to disguise itself by inserting or extracting “notes”—G. Saintsbury, History of Criticism, III, 591
  “取古人成说,是其所非,非其所是,颠倒衣裳,改换头面,乃假借之一法耳。”P.562
  
  61.They are to me original: I have never seen the notions in any other place; yet be that reads them here persuades himself that he has always felt them. —Lives of the Poets, ed., B. Hill, III, 442
  “创辟崭新,未见有人道过,然读之只觉心中向来宿有此意。”——葛雷(Thomas Gray)凭吊墟墓诗 P.573
  
  62.Now I never wrote a “good” line, in my life, but the moment after it was written it seemed a hundred years old. Very commonly I had a sudden conviction that I had seen it somewhere.—O. W. Holmes, The Autocrat of the Breakfast, Table, ii
   “吾生平每得一佳句,乍书于纸,忽觉其为百年陈语,确信曾在不忆何处见过。”——霍姆士 P.574
  
  63.History is philosophy teaching by or learned from examples.
   “历史乃哲学用以教人之实例。”P.586
  
  64.Use of the description instead of the name of a thing—Rhetoric, VI. i, Loeb, 375
  不道事物之名而写事物之状 P.567
  
  65.in peace—which is as much above joy as joy is above pleasure, and which can scarcely be called emotion, since it rests, as it were, in final good, the premium mobile, which is without motion—we find ourselves in the region of “great art”—C. Patmore,Principle in Art 1889, 29
  艺之至者,终和且平,使人情欲止息,造宁静之境;此境高于悦愉,犹悦愉高于痛快也。P.589
  
  66.I never can catch myself.
   自我不可把捉。——休谟 P.597
  
  67.The passage is remarkably like a central tenet of Buddhism, a cult of which Hume could hardly have heard.—O. Elton, A Survey of English Literature: 1730—1780, 1928, II, 163
   酷似佛教主旨,然休谟未必闻有释氏也。P.597
  
  68. Shakespeare in composing had no I, but the I representative. —Biographia Literaria, ed. J. Shawcross, I, 213 note
  无我而有综盖之我。——柯尔律治 P.597
  
  69.When I am assailed with heavy tribulations, I rush out among my pigs, rather than remain alone by myself. The human heart is like a millstone in a mill: when you put wheat under it, it turns and grinds and bruises the wheat to flour; if you put no wheat, it still grinds on, but then’ tis itself it grinds and wears away. So the human heart, unless it be occupied with some employment, leaves space for the devil, who wriggles himself in, and brings with him a whole host of evil thoughts, temptations and tribulations, which grind our the heart. — Martin Luther, Table Talk, tr. W. Hazlitt, “Bohn’s Library”, 275
  “吾遭逢大不如意事,急往饲牧吾猪,不欲闲居独处。人心犹磨坊石硙,苟中实以麦,则碾而成面;中虚无物,石仍辘转无已,徒自研损耳。人心倘无专务,魔鬼乘虚潜入,挟恶念邪思及诸烦恼以俱来,此心遂为所耗蚀矣。”——马丁·路德 P.599
  
  70. Peer Gynt, IV. Xiii, Begriffenfeldt:“Long live the Emperor of self; V. v, Peer:“There’s a surprising lot of layers (in the wild onion).
  Are we never coming to the kernel?
  There isn’t one!
  To the innermost bit
  It’s nothing but layers, smaller and smaller…”
  —Everyman’s Library 171, 201-2
  易卜生一名剧中主角号:“自我之皇帝”而欲觅处世应物之“自我”,则犹剥玉葱求其核心然,层层揭净,至境无可得。P.600
  
  71.For one can only“interpret”a poem by reducing it to an allegory—Which is like eating an apple for its pips.—G. Orwell, Collected Essays, Journalism and Letters, 1968, I, 72
  “此举何异食苹婆者,不嗜其果脯而咀嚼其果中核乎。”P.610
  
  72.The movement of love is circular, at one and the same impulse projecting creatures into independency and drawing them into harmony.—Collected Papers, ed. C. Hartshorne and P. Weiss, VI, 191
  情爱运行,做团圆相,此机一动,独立与偶合遂同时并作,相反相成。——美国哲学家皮尔斯 P.615
11月28日

斜译

      今天学到:横译(translation)、竖译(paraphrase).
      看来还有斜译,某次某先生展示的就是斜译的功夫了大笑
 
6月6日

译“名”

      经常接触翻译的人,每天要遇到各种人名。不用说,操作方法很简单,工具书(词典、百科)里面有标准译法,除掉约定俗成一小部分以外。这里说的标准以外的问题。
      近代以来,译法凡三变。早期,林纾一代经常无视原文发音,用传统小说取名的方法,“范统”“冯渊”等等;后代译者常兼取音义,多用国人姓氏,“郝思嘉”“牛曼”之类;随西化日深,今人翻译多以音译为主,不再顾及中国人的传统习惯了。前天偶然读到一篇涉及傅雷、钱锺书、杨绛杨必翻译的文章,讲到80年代时译家杨必主张截短长名,适应中国习惯,可见至今并无主流定论。
      由于“时代的局限”,最近经常读到各种译名,想起上面这些东西。或许应该像潘天寿先生主张的那样,国画与西画(国名与西名)应该拉开差距,而不应该走徐“融合中西”的路?
     
5月15日

"烘"与"托"

      烘(intenstification )与托( contrast)
       下午在银行排队(顺便说一句,招行排队新政策糟透了,白白浪费一个多小时不说,还有一个家伙在我旁边不停的叫嚷“这是侵犯人权”,只好当着他的面堵起耳朵),翻看《钱钟书集》。
      像很多现在的文章一样,一些词后面注了原文,比如说在“为什么人要穿衣”里面的这对。不同的是,括号外面的都是真正的中文,例如“烘”和“托”,这才是真正的翻译。
      叹服。。。
 
4月7日

“王制”

      读刘小枫《拣尽寒枝》中的一段文字,谈到对柏拉图《理想国》书名的翻译,认为其为常年误译,应为“王制”云云。
      是个好办法。不过,佩服之余,略有一点点怀疑。以古文译外文,准则准矣,恐怕不加注释还是多数人看不明白其中奥妙的。显然需要注释无疑。那么翻译中“炼字”的意义主要在防止望文生义,以讹传讹吗?
    
4月4日

大卫,来碟白肉

      来碟白肉?奥克塔维拔丝?
      告别白肉
      开始拔丝
      我的人名词典
      太小了
8月11日

Reloading……

      今天晚上,没有别的事情的话,准备reload放下一个月左右的常规任务:校对。
      4月份以来,每个人都在思考作这件事的意义,每个人都在质疑如此痛苦的价值;而身在其中的我,其实每次坐下来的时候都心平气和,不知道为什么。当然,如果你看过过去的几条blog,你大概就能猜到一点了。
      此之谓“修行”。
      哈哈……
 
7月15日

翻译之差

      Peter Rowe著,建工版《承传与交融——探讨中国近现代建筑的本质与形式》。翻译太差,令人惊讶。译者完全没有看懂,本来觉得书里面的部分内容不错,但是对照原文,发现译文完全不可读。从书名开始,多次出现误译、错译甚至故意曲译的严重问题,估计看过之后,只会迷惑甚至误解。
      立此存照,希望起到警示作用,想看的也别看了。
 
6月20日

翻译,翻译……

      两三天以来恢复翻译生活,任何急躁的心态都被迫缓慢下来。随着一行一行重复简单的脑力劳动,渐渐体悟到了“两耳不闻窗外事”,“皓首穷经”的某种状态。
      时间紧张,慢不得;可是急也急不得。几乎匀速进行的中等强度劳动发酵的是耐力,酿出来的大概就是“修为”?
      走神了。我很主观的认定,某些认为“40个小时的渲染是体验”甚至“修行”的说法,是和我这两天一样,在被迫做着不那么特别愿意做的事情,并且很长时间看不到做完的希望以后,自我麻痹、欺骗自己的一种方式而已。
      但愿不是这样。
 
5月28日

      某个赛车手说过,赛车运动的关键就是在赛车的控制与失去控制之间找到某种平衡点。
      翻译也是这样。在直译的信与意译的雅之间走钢丝。
      险似乎是好的一种特征。
      古人文论中文品最高一级居然叫”逸品“,可见最好的东西都有”险“的因素。
      今天,协助“)Wy老师,基本完成了Ockman文章The YES Man的翻译,有两个地方特别险,有一个地方甚至用了”天下无贼“里面的一个典故:”技术含量“。
      不知道算不算好。
     
5月8日

译事无小事

      一   份原稿
      两   种语言词典
      四   个索引互相关涉
      十六种责任感、使命感、挫折感、无助感
            刺猬的精神
            蜗牛的速度
  晕………………      
 
4月27日

Fletcher的特征

      题目是昨天写定的,后来因为时间太晚了有事请要做网络故障等一系列的原因,直到现在才能写下去。不幸的是昨天酝酿好的一团情绪没有及时地抽成丝写出来,到现在已经逐渐融化暗淡,变成一团混沌,难以分辨了。只能择要“简”述,这个简不是“言简意赅”的简,而是“因陋就简”的“简”。
     
      模糊记得昨天主要想写的是以下几个方面的内容:
      因为要校对翻译Fletcher的一小部分内容,由于一贯的“追问考据癖”,想要找到一个今天做这样的一件事情的意义,也就是说为什么要翻译Fletcher?
      关于这个问题,官方的解释是“确立翻译的标准”。这种解释有很强的说服力,目前的翻译确实混乱,错译乱译不说,一个人的名字译法数种早已见怪不怪,“洋腔洋调”更是不在话下了。大家都在说应该做这样一件事,可是真要做成本实在高,没点实力无法操作的。看了Z先生校定的一章文稿,规范性和中文语言的“中文性”只能佩服,学习,无话可说。
      可是,我怀疑的是,在现在的情况下,这种确立标准的努力是否能达到预想的效果?这种努力是否是西西弗斯式的?(当然,这对事情本身其实无所谓。)
      进一步地说,对于先生来说,我发现这种确立标准的努力是一贯的。当然的是,一贯就意味着不是时髦的。
     
      在开始做我的工作以前,先看了一下Fletcher的内容。以前真没仔细看过。Fletcher是哪一种建筑史呢?
      Fletcher语言凝练收敛,意大利文艺复兴到巴洛克实例以外居然只有区区两页。没有议论评价,只求客观描述,没有立场和观点,准确客观的资料是核心。
      Fletcher没有彩图,图示都是黑白,多用墨线图,常以类型列举。似乎有某种规范的意味。
      Fletcher没有对理论和文献的特别关心,实物基本上是全部的关注目标。
      Fletcher第一版来源于十九世纪的史学传统,至今第二十版没有走出这个范畴。
     
      那么,作为谋求“确立规范”的一本译书,选择Fletcher也就顺理成章了。
      当然要翻译Fletcher。
 
     
4月26日

工欲善其事

      必先利其
      今天起,
      正式进入个人翻译时代。
      翻译,是一门语言艺术。
      讲究说、学、逗、唱。
4月22日

“松”

      今天为了进行某翻译工作,看了Peter Cook去年的一个讲座的录像。真没想到Peter Cook竟然是这样的一个人,整个感觉是——比较“松”,与我印象中的英国人大不相同。由此对archigram的印象好转30%。
      关键在于翻译。照理说翻译应该保留这种“松”的感觉,语言的“松紧”是一件很要紧的事情。一般来说,紧比较容易把握。松就难一些了,因为要保持学术性质,还好仅仅是个讲座。
      希望这次可以学会“松”一点。